Life Is Precious

35 comments

Some days the preciousness of life beams at you like beacon. At those time we walk so closely between the edges of life and death that what is important becomes clearer. And what is not becomes inconsequential. Emotions abound and our heart fly open.

Yesterday was one of those days. It begun at 6 AM with a text announcing the passing of a beautiful woman and friend. Her incredible, patient and loving daughters ministered and guided her gently through the end of a long and arduous illness. (And she guided them, too)

“She just passed.”

“She is in heaven.”

They held her and held each other with open hearts and minds.

make someone smile

Life is Precious

While I exchanged supportive texts with a few other friends I read this article (Life After Loss), and then, unfortunately, checked the news. It is an intense time in this world to be sure. The gang rape in New Delhi caught my attention. And a tribute to the slain firemen* touched my heart.

*With the holidays full of love and family, and the young losses of such traumatic and senseless deaths in Newtown still unsettled in our minds, another horrific event hit us on Christmas Eve just a few miles from my home. Firefighters were called to a house and vehicle fire in Webster, NY, and then ruthlessly shot at. (Yes, with an assault riffle.) Two first responders were killed and three more injured. 

People are not sure what to say. What to think. Some people wonder why and more have strong opinions as to why. I reflected on all of it as I readied for work. What is my role? I wondered. Am I doing all I can? The violence has to stop.

Then, while I kept in touch with my friends through texting, I began a long day with ten clients scheduled. Many more “life is precious” conversations ensued. Many more questions asked, some unanswerable. Relief, tears, loss, worry, and love expressed. I can’t tell you everything because of confidentiality, but here is an example *  of what people are feeling their way through.

*I changed some identifying factors to protect their privacy.

Precious Conversations

A woman announced her pregnancy (after seven years of infertility and three miscarriages) but she was spotting blood, so was painfully afraid to be excited in case. (I cried because I wanted to be excited, too.)

A Christmas Eve fight with a alcoholic father.

A call from a mom saying her (teenage) son-my client-was in the hospital after a suicide attempt that morning. This broke my heart. The doctor at the hospital told me that he was disappointed to be alive. “That’s not good,” the doctor added. I prayed.

Another 16 year old who’s broken-hearted after her first love broke up with her, showed me the cuts she made on her upper arm, because  she “doesn’t like herself.”

A 13 year old thinks she is ugly, and “not good enough” because of what some bullies told her 4 years ago. She is so not ugly. 

Someone committed to accepting himself fully, unconditionally.

Someone let go of guilt. A guilt so intense it immobilized her.

A man asked, Why me? Why did I deserve to be so unloved? (I reminded him he was loved.)

A teacher frustrated with such intense performance regulations in NY state that she has no time for social management in the classroom. No time to teach the kids how to love themselves, treat each other well. Or prevent violence. (There is one counselor for 500 kids). Made me think of where this pressure to “be good enough” comes from.

Make a difference

I had a new client scheduled last in the day. Aside from a name, I usually know nothing about who it is I am about to meet. I was tired from the intensity of the day. (I was tired when I read the news in the morning and this is nine hours later!)

However, embolded by the love I have for the people I spoke with that day, I was energetic and eager to meet someone new and hear his or her story. A nice looking man came in and introduced himself as a volunteer fire fighter. My heart sank. I got a first hand account of the men who fell on Christmas Eve in the line of duty. It was a beautiful account of some amazingly dedicated men. And I was reminded once again that life is precious. But also in a way death is precious.

Life Is Precious

Life Is Precious

We keep on keeping on. Letting those life’s lived change us for the better, remind us how to be good people, how to make changes before it is too late. (It is never too late–even after death relationships can change. Read I Miss You Means I Love You)

It has been weeks of intensity when people have questioned our purpose in big and small ways. Some of us have said goodbye to old ways. Some of us have said goodbye to loved ones. But with every ending there is a beginning. An opportunity awaits us and it is our job to answer it. I see people taking this opportunity everyday. Turning to love to guide them out of the darkness. I want to be among them, to make a difference. I have to remember that it doesn’t take much. Small difference and big difference are all the same.

Over to you. Do you agree that life is precious?

“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” Mary Oliver


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35 Comments

Harleena [email protected] Writer

That was beautiful Jodi!

Yes indeed, life IS precious and something to be treasured and valued. I just wish more people would realize this fact and appreciate all that we have got, rather than what we haven’t, and help make this world a better place.

Thanks for sharing.:)

Jodi Lobozzo Aman

I know what you mean. Many people live in fear of deficit. This is taught and passed down, we have to change it though, or things will continue to worsen!

Kelly Hashway

Yes, life is precious. It breaks my heart when people forget that. Life is a gift and one to be cherished.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

It is heartbreaking, it is a disconnection to love. So reaching out is all we can do!

Robert

One of my motto’s is enjoy what you have not want what you don’t.

I am also reminded of a saying I read somewhere once and that is “Death does not only affect the dead”.

Lovely article Jodi, thanks for the posting.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

I think it affects the living more, right? Once you’re dead there is nothing left to fear. e have to be happy with what we have instead of always reaching! I know exactly what you mean!

Robert

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself!!!!

Or as my mother says today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

I love that quotation. Fear is sort of our only problem!

Justin

Hi Jodi,
I agree that all life is precious. From people, to animals, to trees and yes, even spiders. Collectively humanity is seeing that all of life is connected.

I understand with all the 24 hour coverage of horrific events can make it seem like this world is bad, but it is not.

If we could just spend 10 minutes a day focusing on what is good about life, our perceptions and attitudes would change.

Take care.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Yes, building skills in seeing things in a positive light is important! I can change everything. We don’t have to change it all–just that one thing, but that has a ripple effect! Thanks for stopping by!

Tina Barbour

This is a beautiful post, Jodi. I believe that life is precious, and I loved reading how you see life as precious. I am trying more and more not to “wait” to enjoy life and all the living.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Don’t wait Tina! Be you and celebrate, I see your progress increasing lately! You are doing awesome! How does that feel? xoxox

My Inner Chick

Dear, Jodi,
it is the people like you in the world who give off glimmers of light in the darkest hours.

You. Are. Beautiful.
You. Are. A. Prayer.

Xxxx Love. Love. Love.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Let’s stand hand and hand and light the streets so no one else is left in the dark!

Stanley

Jodi,

I can only give you a simple thank you! Other words escape me at the moment as my tears are getting in the way!

Stanley

Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Let them flow and love them up! They mean love, Stanley!

Phyllis

We have allowed a violent culture to develop via TV, movies, video etc. These images are models for behavior, giving responses to anger, fear and rejection. These images accumulate in the subconscious of the young mind (and the not-so-young) then acted upon. Must reform the media. PR

Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Let’s work on it, build up positive, special interest stories about love and friendship and people coming together! I think it is all a propaganda to promote war. We can say this isn’t OK, but allow war to go on…

brenda

How can we not? I suspect each of takes our lives for granted until a single moment in time where what we knew is no longer. Something pivotal occurs and there we are stranded in a moment we can’t get out of. Sadly some of us never leave that moment and become bitter, lost, or lonely, while the world moves on. The moment – whatever it was or is never leaves us but how we chose to move forward or grow is what makes us become what we were meant to be. I believe this to my core. Yes, life is precocious. Every single second of everyday is meant to be cherished and enjoyed, good or bad, sad or happy, it’s our heaven on earth. I try to remember this but life gets ahead of me sometimes. When it does, something as simple as a post (like this one) or mom and toddler walking across the street while I stopped at the light will remind me to breath in the world a little bit slower.

I am sorry for you loss, truly. I wish your peace and love, and thank you for reminding me to breathe in the world around me.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Thank you, Brenda. As I was writing some reflections about my friend, I was trying to channel your writing skills. I breathe in and write the passion within.

brenda

You have your own amazing writing skills. Hugs, and all the best.
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The Writing Goddess

Life IS precious, very precious (besides, it’s the only game in town).

Sometimes I imagine myself in one of those movies where the person wakes up in the body of another person (Switch or Freaky Friday), and I like to THINK – once I got over the original WTF moment – that I would try explore the experience, rather than being totally focused on getting my own body back. To accept I must have some life-lesson to learn, there must be SOME plan in here, and go with the flow.

So if I can do that in my imagination, why not apply it to real life? There MUST be a purpose – and I don’t have to know what it is, that’s not my job, but there is something for me to learn, or do, some way for me to grow right now, in THIS situation, in THESE circumstances.

I don’t WANT to live in a world where children are mowed down like grass in a childroom, or firefighters are ambushed, or good friends die much too young, but that’s the world I’m in, and I’m doing what I can to make it better, to shed a little light.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

You’re right it is the only game in town. We can go for it, or stay in misery. There is not other choice! I like how you can apply your imagination to life. I think this is an important point. We can look at any problem this way. From a distance and we can learn the lesson quick so we no longer have to suffer!

Deb

Thank you Jodi.
Life is precious… The key for me is to
Keep it in the day & be grateful for the
Simple things~
Sometimes that not easy for me 🙂
Love & light
D

Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Thank You Deb, I will appreciate the simple things!

Monica

Jodi, I wish everyone could see how precious life is. Then maybe we wouldn’t have random killings, and mass shootings. Life should be celebrated and revered. It’s a gift and yet so many of us toss it away without giving it any thought. How very sad.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

I’m deeply moved by the recent events and they remind me how important it is for me to be an agent for life, ya know? Thanks, Monica, for all your loveliness.xoxo Happy New Year!

Laura Zera

I think this is one of your most beautiful posts ever, Jodi. Thank you for sharing it.
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Jodi Lobozzo Aman

Thanks, Laura. It was a special one to write!

Begin With A Beginner’s Mind | Heal Now and Forever

[…] second person is a teen who has been suicidal this past month. (Not the one in my Life is Precious post. She could still use some prayers). Another one. (I don’t know if it is in the […]

Nikky44

So much sadness in this post. I feel with each and everyone of all those mentioned. It’s because I know. I’m sure they will be OK because they have you, if not as therapist, at least your prayers. Thank you.<3 <3
Nikky44 recently posted..Guest post: An open blessingMy Profile

Jodi Lobozzo Aman

They are all doing fine! There is good news always in the future! Xo

Spring Is A Time For Renewal | Heal Now and Forever

[…] was also lots of grieving among my close friends and community. For all of them, the Spring will bring more good memories […]

Nikky44

What makes it precious? My answer would be Love. But people can love and are loved on the other side too?

Jodi Aman

I guess then, “life” includes both sides.


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