A client told me about these Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz so I looked them up. I love the simplicity of them. Years later I was in a movie with him.
“Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements was published in 1997. For many, The Four Agreements is a life-changing book, whose ideas come from the ancient Toltec wisdom of the native people of Southern Mexico. The Toltec were ‘people of knowledge’ – scientists and artists who created a society to explore and conserve the traditional spiritual knowledge and practices of their ancestors. The Toltec viewed science and spirit as part of the same entity, believing that all energy – material or ethereal – is derived from and governed by the universe.”
The four agreements – Don Miguel Ruiz’s code for life
Here is how Don Miguel Ruiz summarizes ‘The Four Agreements’:
Agreement 1: Be impeccable with your word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
Agreement 2: Don’t take anything personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
Agreement 3: Don’t make assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
Agreement 4: Always do your best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, regret and anxiety.
Which agreement is your favorite?
I’m speechless!!!!!!
First time i heard about Don Miguel Ruiz, was yesterday, and i have posted yesterday his quote as a status “You will only receive a negative idea if your mind is fertile ground for that idea.”
Agreements one and Four i have always applied, Agreements 2 and 3, I know them but they are too hard to apply,even though i keep trying.
Thank you so much for this post. I LOVED IT 🙂
Thank you for always putting so much thought into it!
This was a great summary of how to live your life! The good news is there are only 4 agreements to live by. The not so good news is I need to work on all 4. As much as I try I seem to somehow break these agreements one way or another. I do try my best but only some of the time. Many times I don’t want to try at all. I always make assumptions. I always take things personally and I use the word to speak against myself almost constantly. On the other hand I know what I need now and have a goal to work toward.
Thank you so much! I always see you working hard! The assumptions are tricky aren;t they?
Yes and the assumptions are often related to judgement and taking things personally.
Jodi, thank you for sharing Ruiz’s wise words to live by. So spot on for those prone to anxiety and self-doubt (myself included!).
My favorite is #2. These words in particular resonate:
“What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream.”
Lisa W. Rosenberg recently posted..An Early Biracial Memory
It is so true, people are not mean because they don’t like you, they are mean because they don’t like themselves!
This is a great book, it’s been in our house for a long time. Thanks for reminding me of these words of wisdom.
This is my sister’s favorite book. I want to read it for a long time but still I cannot find time..because I want fully to enjoy it.
I like don’t make assumptions because that’s something I need to work on sometimes.
Kelly Hashway recently posted..Delirium by Lauren Oliver
We learn so much from everyone we meet. My fav is #4…it was my dads profound statement when I can asked him what I could do for him as he was near death…and he said..”do the best you can”. Those words were such a comfort a very difficult time
Aw, Thanks Aunt Mary! Grandpa…such a beautiful memory of him!
I’ve always favored ‘don’t make assumptions.’ Nice post. Your friend from SheWrites Blogger
I love these agreements– have read them before but I’m thinking I should print them out and post them somewhere very visible! I’m not sure which is my favorite, but the one I have to pay the most attention to is #2. It’s so easy to take things personally…like Lisa Rosenberg, I find this quote really resonates: “What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream.” How easy to forget when we are caught up in our own perception of the world.
Sarah Baughman recently posted..Why I Miss My Car
Thanks Sarah, it is always projection. This would save us so much hurt if we knew it!
WOW, what perfect timing this post. It connected to me given what I wrote last night, but also as I was reading this I heard from a friend he said “In Rio… Drinking a caipirinha and thinking of you” Of course I swore at him, but I know what he wasn’t being mean or taunting me. What I love about coming to visit you is you always share thoughtful and inspiring suggestions on how to look at oneself. I read his book when it came out and of course I had completely forgotten it. Thanks for reminding me. I need to dust of the cover and read the pages within.
Brenda recently posted..Message to Heaven
I read his book years ago and had actually forgotten what the four agreements were. They make so much sense! I have a hard time not taking things too personally, and I make assumptions about others that don’t help anyone. It’s good to be reminded of these agreements. I have his book on my shelf nearby. I think I need to take it down and put it in my “to read soon” stack! Thank you!
Tina recently posted..Washing my hands
Glad to inspire you! Thanks for the comment!
The one that hits me the hardest is to not take things so personal. I think it connects to the rest and I actually think it is quite selfish to take things so personal. Isn’t it a way of saying that what you think is more important. We should all be joyful in the fact that we are different for we are all made in the image of God.