Your thoughts are part of you. Human’s on average have 60,000 thoughts a day. We can’t even register all of the thoughts that we have!
If we hold an identity of ourselves, for example: “insignificant”; an opinion about a person: “selfish;” or a certain view of the world: “chaos,” we notice and remember the thoughts that go along with these definitions. We see our inadequacies, we see another person’s meanness, we see a world falling apart. And sometimes not much else.
If our thought is evidence for what we believe, we take it in and solidify its truth status. (Even if that “truth” is not true, i.e., “I am not worthy.”). This, obviously, greatly effects how we respond to that thought.
The things is, we have other ideas, too! But when they do not add to our present understanding, they are usually discarded.
“I am inherently good.”
What would happen if we would notice them more? “I did something good.” “She was nice to him.” “Saving one paper napkin does make a difference.” ??? Wouldn’t that have us taking action towards these more? Absolutely!
Our Western culture is indoctrinated to notice “the bad.” This is directly from commercialism. Advertisers need us to see our deficits so that we need their products to make us look, feel, and be better. We have complied, and most of us notice the negative far more than perceive the positive.
How many time a day do you smile?
Babies smile 400 times a day, teenagers smile 17 times a day, and 60 year-olds smile 4 times a day. It seems that as we grow, we think we have less to smile about. What happens? Why does negativity take over positivity?
People say that we are our own worse critic, and I tend to agree. We are harsh and beat our selves up over the littlest thing, adding to our feelings of inadequacy. The voices of people who have hurt us have far more weight that any compliments we have had along the way. We are anxious.
“Don’t be afraid of your fears. They’re not there to scare you. They’re there to let you know that something is worth it.” ~C. JoyBell C.
WE must do something to change this! We have to start seeing ourselves and our world through a different lens, or else we will become more and more unhappy, and our world will fall farther into disarray. And, we have to “be the change that we want to see” and it starts with how we see ourselves. We have to see ourselves as having personal agency. That we are not passive recipients of this life, but agents to make a difference. We need to recognize our abilities and the abilities of all around us (and no longer assume we need this or that product or pill to save us.)
We need to notice what is out there to smile about, what is in our world worth saving.
Here is my random list….
A hug from a child, a much awaited “I love you,” a “thank you,” a fawn drinking from her mother, a plant spouting fresh leaves, beautiful music, random acts of kindness, a gorgeous sunset, a farmers market, a outstretched hand, a beautiful quote, a message from an old friend, lying on the soft grass, feeding the hungry, a small group of citizens making a difference in their local government…Watch my Facebook Anxiety video for more.
Please add to the list in the comments section. What parts of you don’t you see?