This is why women need women
In the 1.3 billion year history since Homo Erectus walked the earth, we have only lived predominantly in single family homes for less than 100 years. That’s a drop in the ocean.
For millions and millions of years our brains, cells, emotions and souls have been living, cooking, child rearing, collecting, creating, eating, playing, and sharing in community around a fire of other women. (Okay, the fire was only 790,000 years ago.) The point is, we evolved in community, sharing time and experience with other women.
It takes a village to raise a woman.
Together we bloom. In isolation, we wither.
The Five Senses
1. Sight
Being seen through the eyes of another woman helps us see ourselves unbiased of our negative self-talk. Being seen helps us feel worthy and lovable.
Women evolved to see with their peripheral vision in order to scan the forest for food and medicine while they walked along. Our brains have been developed to see the big-picture view. We can see a need for comfort, see to protect one another from danger, see to appreciate each other’s creations. Of course, we can see beauty. We look for each other when one of us is lost.
Women can speak to each other through our eyes.
2. Hearing
Women listen to each other. They allow their friends’ words to enter their hearts and hold it close.
Being listened to lifts us up, vitalizing us. Women don’t jump to fixing things. Instead, we validate how the other feels, until she feels whole.
Whenever we hear our babies cry, and comfort them. Every day we listen with rapture when our children are telling us of their adventures. with our sensitivity, we hear the wind and the whispers of the trees to tread softy. We listen to Spirit through our intuition.
3. Taste
Women cook and eat together. Our ancestors have tested medicines from the earth and discussed them around the fire. We make and give meals when someone is sick. Women tell each other that they are not fat. This Eating Disorder awareness week, we must show our daughter’s that they are beautiful just as they are! Just Like Louise from Dare Boldly. And help them have a healthier relationship with food than we have. Let them see food as nourishment and gifts from the earth, instead of as the enemy.
4. Smell
We smell our babies, and our food and the flowers that bloom out our windows. We smell our tea while we are chatting together and the food to make sure it is still fresh enough for our family.
Smell is our greatest memory.
5. Feeling
Women feel deep empathy for each other. Our hearts break when our loved ones are in pain. We feel elated with our girlfriend’s achievements and celebrate good news together.
We feel our children’s heads when we worry they are warm. And cuddle them when they are distressed.
Women hugs feed our souls.
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This is why women need women
We feel deeply
And we allow ourselves to because we know we can handle it. We are strong women. We know that the depth of our feeling is the real richness of life. Never trying to shy away from connection, especially when it is for the other person.
We create
When we are in touch with our spirit we can express ourselves in so many ways – our food, our home, our classrooms, our craft space, the lullabies we sing, and stories we tell. And we create space for people to be exactly where they are, to express themselves fully in whatever way works for them. This helps us create community, friendship, and family.
We calm
Knowing how to nurture is second nature – holding other women when they are upset. We listen, share, and honor each other’s feelings. When we tell a girlfriend how we feel, we find out that they have felt that way too. Then we feel “normal” and accepted and we judge ourselves a little less and put things in perspective.
We protect
We stand up for what is right, and for those who cannot advocate for themselves. And then, we stand with power but also with respect, honor and peace. We help each other get away from what can harm us. It takes a community to help someone that is in an abusive relationship. We let them know that they are noticed and help them find their way to healing. In addition, we help them feel filled up when they feel empty. It is impossible to heal in isolation. We are only a self in relationship, and so to heal, we must be in relationship.
Women point out each others’ blind spots.
We connect
In most families, women manage the social calendar. We plan the celebrations, the birthdays, the wedding showers, we offer to babysit, and we plan the meal delivery schedule to those who are sick or morning. It is us who plans reunions, vacations, and holiday dinners. We call, we write, we say I miss you and I love you or I’m thinking of you. These are the things that build relationships and keep the world moving forward in a loving way. Love is ever expanding.
Women need women!
Over to you readers: Tell me your favorite story of a woman saving your life.
Am I the first person to leave a comment on your new website? Yay if I am! I’m so honored to be here!
It was Barbara F. who saved my life. I was a 15 year old, living with my sister. She was the social worker assigned to me after I was caught shoplifting. She set me on a better path, showed me love and encouraged me to love myself. She was also the first adult I ever had a close relationship with who was kind and thoroughly non-judgmental. That was 1984-1986, and I’ve tried to find her since, with no luck. If she’s still out there, I hope she can feel the love I continually send to her.
I have realized recently that while I like working with dudes just fine, I much prefer the female energetic. I hope to spend more of the second half of my career working with female groups/teams/audiences. Love it, for all the reasons you mentioned above.
p.s. Your new site is great! Such a different look from before. I like the way you shine through more in the words and pictures. xo
Laura Zera recently posted..Travel: ChickyBus’ Lisa Egle Explains Her Adventure Style
Thanks Laura, for the site feedback! Love the story about Barbara and I am glad that you looked for her. So sorry that you couldn’t find her but i have a message. “You are worth saving!” and “Thank you for this tribute!”
Jodi, I love this tribute to women. I have a lot of memories of good women in my life, but the one I’m thinking of now is a woman who was a close friend when i lived in another state, going to grad school many years ago. I was floundering and losing my way, and this friend was a good listener. She was also the one who encouraged me to see a therapist by telling me that SHE was seeing one. I got into therapy and it literally changed (and probably saved) my life. It was knowing that this friend had the courage to get help that gave me that courage.
Tina Fariss Barbour recently posted..An old passion comes to life
Tina, I am so glad she let you feel that it was OK! You accepted it and you are such a great person! So glad you survived! Thanks for all of your editing help! I have to learn about my comas. xo
Hi Jodi,
I love your new website. Congratulations, you have done a superb job!
This article is really an unparalleled compliment to the power of women, their benevolence and magnanimity…they can just heal with words! With all humility, I would like to say that I have been trying to do that, listening to all my friends, connecting with them in a positive manner and caring for all as I couldn’t get that myself…so I try to fill that vacuum in my life in this manner.
Thanks, Jodi for putting together such wonderful gestures that we all are capable of!
Balroop Singh recently posted..Where is He?
Thank you so much! Friends do fill a vacuum in our hearts!
Hi Jodi,
Congratulations on your new blog – it’s looking awesome 🙂
I love the look of it all, especially the header with your lovely face right on top – great going! Coming to the post – yes, women can really do wonders if they get down to it – they feel, connect, emote, and do so much more – and much better than men I think.
I think they are always so vibrant and full of energy. Not to mention the multi-tasking skills they have when it comes to working or parenting as they have to manage both the things, and they do it pretty well. Hats-off to all the wonderful women who make it happen 🙂
Thanks for sharing. Have a nice week ahead 🙂
Thanks Harleena! Hats off to women! I love it!
Dearest Jodi, your new website design is AWESOME! Congratulation on getting this done and for continuing to teach, enlighten and guide us with your loving and generous spirit.
Thank you so much Kelli! You are a light!
“Being seen helps us feel worthy and lovable.” You saw me, noticed me and listened to me, and that saved my life. You still do every day. I like how I can associate something to each paragraph in this post. It’s true that the 5 senses help me feel more connected. It makes it “real”. When in doubt, I just need to use the special oil you gave me and the smell of it brings back all the good feelings, the connection.
You saved my life for the first time two years ago as I was drowning in an ocean of pain and abuse. You helped me get to the surface. you’re still holding my hand to help me swim through it all, to guide me to safety and healing.
Thank you Jodi <3
I hope one day we can hear this entire story of LIBERATION, Nikky & Jodi. XXXxxx
My Inner Chick recently posted..Our Stories Become Our Lives
We are putting it together! It’ll be a while though since there’s lots on that list! <3
🙂 love you, thats why. You are special!
**Being listened to lifts us up, vitalizing us. Women don’t jump to fixing things. Instead, we validate how the other feels, until she feels whole.**
Jodi, every word in the post is identifiable, true, & completely understandable.
Brilliant.
I love this SO so so MUCH. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I LOVE this new web page. WOW.
My Inner Chick recently posted..Our Stories Become Our Lives
Thanks Kimmy. Love you too!
I too Love Love Love the new website — so much vibrancy and life and verve! Very cool.
and thank you for including me in your post — it’s an honour as this post makes me feel all shiny and bright!
You are shining brilliantly. Thank you!
Louise Gallagher recently posted..Stop. Slow down. Breathe and Be.
Thank you! YOU are very shiny and brilliant! xo
Hello and thank you for visiting my blog and “introducing” yourself. I’ve been perusing your website and love the message you share. I’ll be following along via bloglovin’.
Thanks Debi! Glad to be sharing together!
This is a beautiful reminder, Jodi! I love all the historical references as well. It’s so important to stick together and support one another 🙂 I love the new look of your site! Such a beautiful pic of you. Cheers.
lisa thomson recently posted..Ooh La La-You’re a French Goddess
Thanks Lisa! Women need women. I guess that says it all!
You have a fabulous website Jodi! You did some good work there.
I like this post because I think that it’s together that we are strong. Women need women, and we ned to keep sharing and listening and helping each other. It’s the only way for us to find peace and be considered for who we are.
You said it all.
Take care.
Marie recently posted..Lent 2014 & the importance of education
Yes, together we are strong! I’m happy you are here with me!
Jodi, I love, love the new blog! I know it’s been a while since I visited but I’ve been dealing with some personal issues. I’m sorry for absence. That said, now that I’m here, I can truly appreciate the power of sisters helping sisters! Women need to bond more and seeing the world through another woman’s eyes is a vital step. I hope we can do this more and in the process, acquire empathy and understanding. Hugs! 🙂
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