How to Deal with Tragedy

With so many mass shootings in the last few years, our hearts are broken again and again. After Friday’s school shooting in Santa Fe, Texas, we are left baffled by how to deal with tragedy after tragedy.

We haven’t recovered from the last one yet.

This is because you are human and care about people.

Helplessness and hopelessness that we can feel safe in this world ever again abound. From a personal perspective, watching such violence happen, feels like an overload on our senses. Due to our human empathy, adrenaline spikes. Especially to those of us who are sensitive. And from a larger perspective, this personal perspective makes us feel guilty because the suffering of the victims’ families is so much greater than our own. How dare we complain?

But this is it. When you deal with tragedy by getting stuck in helplessness, it is no way to live. First of all, you can’t help anyone else from here and your community needs you. Second, it is not good for you here. Feeling like the world is going to hell in a handbasket and you can’t do anything is soul crushing. That is because your soul wants to do something. It is meant to do something and it won’t stop irking you until you listen.

Fear and Tragedy

I am trying to listen to my soul. And I am trying to have faith—in myself, in other people, in our country—but I often feel like I am hanging onto gossamer threads.

After the tragedy in Las Vegas in October, I went live on Facebook to share my thoughts about how to deal with tragedy. At first, I hesitated. I mean, who am I to offer any advice or guidance at a time like this? I wish there was a wise person here to speak to everyone, make them feel better and less helpless and hopeless. Tell us HOW to think of this. Advise us on where to put it.

But then, I realized that everyone is looking around and I’m a coward if I don’t speak. And then I will get stuck in helplessness myself. So I went live.

Negativity seems to dominate, and sometimes I worry that my light is not enough to spread hope, keep peace and help people feel valued again. I get on Facebook and I don’t know what the words are that will heal, calm people’s anxiety, and settle my own worries. So I went for a drive to center myself and attempt to offer some soothing words to those who may need them.

Watch my video to see what came out. Pertains to today as much as it did in October.

Here is what you can do to deal.

[click_to_tweet tweet=”How do we deal with tragedies like #schoolshootings? @JodiAman https://jodiaman.com/blog/deal-with-tragedy/ #neveragain #santafe ” quote=”How do we deal with tragedies like #schoolshootings?”]

How can we help?

Start in your family and then don’t draw the circle of your family too small.

It is not easy, but we always have to remember that we have a choice when something bad happens: we can stay in the fear or we can choose to see with love. Staying stuck in the fear is understandable. We may think we’re protecting ourselves that way. But that’s a lie that anxiety tells.

The world needs you

By choosing love and action, we are saying that we don’t know what will happen, but we are committed to shining our light and doing something to ward off the darkness. It’s a decision to leave people and situations better than how we found them.

We can commit to making change within ourselves, our relationships and communities for the better. It doesn’t have to be a big act. We can send aid, volunteer, give blood etc. There are plenty of opportunities to help. And that’s us responding out of LOVE and not fear.

If you need guidance on learning how to choose love over fear, I can help.

How do you help spread love in your life and community? Share with me below!